What is Masking?
Masking is a tool - one that both Neurotypical and Neurodivergent (ex: Autism or ADHD) folks use. In contexts like work or socializing with less familiar people it can be adaptive. When we’re perceived as more likeable, that has a positive effect on our work or social life. Neurodivergent folks learn from a young age that when they Mask, they can cover up their difficulties associated with social interactions.
Therefore, neurodivergent folks are more likely to mask in situations where others “drop the mask”, meaning at home with their family, with very close friends, or even - when they’re on their own. Masking all the time is EXHAUSTING- think of how you feel after putting “your best foot forward” at a job interview or a first date, and now imagine you’re doing that everyday, all day long. Prolonged Masking can contribute towards delays in diagnosis, and can result in poor mental health, such as anxiety and depression.
Autistic Masking and ADHD Masking are inherently different, because the strengths and challenges of Autism and ADHD are different. Below, we outline what Masking can look like, and the specific purpose in tends to serve for each diagnosis.
Autistic Masking
In Autism, Masking is a tool to hide difficulties with doing “good guessing” as to what other people are thinking or feeling. This is also referred to as Theory of Mind, a cognitive ability that allows us to understand and attribute mental states to others, and differentiate between our perspective and other people’s. Autistic individuals have differences in Theory of Mind, their brains have prioritized the development of other cognitive abilities over this. This is part of how Autistic individuals have unique perspectives, and are able to notice details that Neurotypical people miss.
Masking can look like:
Forcing eye contact: Making or sustaining eye contact even when it feels very uncomfortable.
Hiding stimming: Stopping self-soothing movements like hand-flapping, rocking, or fidgeting. Or engaging in more subtle forms of stimming that others may not notice (i.e. nail picking)
Scripting: Practicing what to say in a conversation before it happens, or having set phrases you go to in conversation.
Mirroring: Copying the facial expressions, body language, or tone of voice of other people.
Hiding sensory pain: Pretending loud noises or bright lights do not bother you, when they very clearly do.
ADHD Masking
In ADHD, Masking is a tool to hide difficulties with sustaining attention, disorganization, and impulsivity in social settings where this may be misunderstood. This can look like working 10 x harder than your neurotypical peers to sustain focus during a conversation, especially those outside of your interest level, or during tasks that require sustained mental effort. It can mean attempting to suppress your brain’s urge to share information associated with a topic, for fear it will be perceived as rude.
Masking can look like:
Overcompensation: Building elaborate systems of color-coded calendars, multiple alarms, and detailed checklists to cover up disorganization.
Suppressing Movement: Forcing stillness, clicking pens quietly, or bouncing legs under a desk to hide physical restlessness.
Social Scripting: Rehearsing conversations or phone calls beforehand and mimicking the body language of peers.
Perfectionism: Staying late at work or school to double-check tasks and ensure no mistakes slip through.
Receiving a formal diagnosis of Autism or ADHD can be hugely supportive for people who are experiencing burnout and overwhelm from prolonged masking. Understanding the WHY behind what’s driving these behaviors allows you to put strategies in place that support “Dropping the Mask”.
Author: Dr Hayley Bell (Licensed Psychologist)
